We were enjoying our new home. Our garden, trees and yard landscaping plants were growing. Our church was continuing to grow. I continued giving Bible studies, but everyday new damaging information regarding Adventism was coming to us. The information pipeline was called the “Adventist Underground.” Some days we cried as we received this new information and some days we laughed as hilarious cartoons also were arriving in the mail. Dale has printed some of these cartoons in the back of his book Truth Led Me Out.
Dale’s cousin, Dr. Alvin Ratzlaff, had asked him to give a week of spiritual talks to a non-denominational, Christian, teenage group home in the Dominican Republic. In his psychiatric practice Alvin often referred troubled teenagers to this home to help straighten out their lives. Alvin said he would take care of the expenses for us if we would go. We arranged our vacation time to make this trip.
Mike would be graduating in June, and then we would leave for the Dominican Republic. Bruce and Mike would take care of themselves while we were away. Mike was now working full-time with Bruce in his construction business.
We flew to Miami, Florida, where we met Alvin and his wife Carol, and then flew on to Haiti where we would spend a few days before flying over to the Dominican Republic. The visit in Haiti was a real cultural shock. This is one of the poorest countries and the evidence of the difference in class between the poor and rich was heart rending. The caregivers of some of the poorest, physically handicapped people would place them on the streets to beg for money. One small child looked as if she were at the end of her life due to starvation. Tears welled up in my eyes as I saw her begging for money. The shop keepers inside the store where she was sitting on the street told us the parents never fed her. They were starving her to make people feel sorry for her, so she could receive money from begging! It did not look like they would be able to use her much longer. There is no law to prevent such a cruelty there. I wanted to feed her, but I was told I could not. I could only give her money.
On Sabbath we attended the Seventh-day Adventist church in Port-au-Prince. When we walked into the church, we were surprised to be greeted by our 1956 Monterey Bay Academy senior class sponsor, Mr. Howlett. He was serving there as principal of the mission school. Mr. Howlett asked Dale to give the Sabbath sermon, which he gladly did, and we were then invited to the Howlett’s home for a delicious Sabbath lunch of tropical foods.
The next day we flew to the Dominican Republic and took a long, bumpy truck ride up into the mountains to the school where Dale would give his week of talks. The school was in a beautiful, higher elevation area, and it was much cooler than down in the city. We enjoyed our few days with the students and the faculty, who were deeply committed to helping the students learn discipline and get their lives turned around.
Upon arriving home at the San Francisco airport, we were amazed to be greeted by a large group of people from our church holding a “Welcome Home” sign. We thought Bruce and Mike would be the only ones to meet us, but one of the families brought their motor home filled with many of the members of our church, and they would take us back to Watsonville and our home.
On the way home, they inquired of our trip, and we shared highlights with them. We then asked how things were going at home. The happy, excited tone of the conversation changed as we learned things were not going that well.
Phil and Kathy Day, Jeanie (a girl that I had studied with who was recently baptized), Carolyn and Dale, Sheila Scott, (Dale’s secretary) Joann and Loren Carlson. Bruce and Mike, as well as many others, were present but not in this picture.
One of the families in our church had accused us of taking church funds to build our house. They had requested an audit of the church books, which proved this accusation untrue. Strange rumors began circulating through our church. People would corner us, asking us pointed questions regarding our stand on Ellen White or the 1844 investigative judgment doctrine.
One day I was invited to the home of a lady who was hosting a group study that I was leading for ladies of our church. This lady and her sister-in-law wanted to know my stand on jewelry. I read them several texts showing that in the Old Testament the times God took away jewelry from the Jews was when He was punishing them for their idolatry and turning their backs on Him and for not remembering all the wonderful things God had done for them.
Thus I will judge you (Israel) like women who commit adultery or shed blood are judged; and I will bring on you the blood of wrath and jealousy. I will also give you into the hands of your lovers, and they will tear down your shrines, demolish your high places, strip you of your clothing, take away your jewels, and will leave you naked and bare (Ezekiel 6:39).
I explained to them that this is an allegory depicting the heathen nations that Israel had mingled with causing Israel to fall into idolatry. God used this allegory to warn them of the coming doom they would experience for their disobedience to Him.
We talked about the times the Old Testament speaks of jewels as a positive blessing of God. Then in the New Testament I read:
In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external- braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands (1 Peter 3:1- 5).
These ladies argued that the word “merely” IS an added word and therefore not a true translation from the Greek. When I pointed out that the verse also includes wearing of dresses, they changed the subject, asking another question. I soon saw them look at each other with the look of “We’ve caught her now. She must believe jewelry is OK and therefore she doesn’t believe in Ellen White.” They said they did not want me to come to their home for any more Bible studies.
I do not know why these ladies asked me these questions, for at that time I was not wearing any jewelry and still believed in the SDA doctrine that the adornment must be of the heart, not something that is put on externally. In fact, Dale had just baptized a teenage girl I had given Bible studies to, and when she came to church the week after being baptized wearing a necklace I asked her to take it off. I told her that since she had been baptized she must now abide by all the doctrines of the church. I am appalled now, that I did this, but I was committed to upholding all of the SDA doctrines. I was not doing this out of a sense of legalism, but because I fully believed that following all of the SDA rules was the same as following Jesus.
During the request for prayer time one day at my Bible study group in Hollister, I asked for prayer for the leaders of the Adventist organization. At the end of the study all the Adventist ladies stayed until every other denominational lady had left. The SDA women now told me that I was not to ask for prayer for our leaders in the group again.
I asked, “Why, what is wrong with praying for our leaders? They are human and need prayer just like the rest of us.”
They answered, “It implies our leaders are wrong and need prayer. We know our leaders are not wrong. They are God’s highest power on earth, and we must trust every decision they make. Asking for prayer for them puts Adventism in the wrong light with these other ladies.”
I responded, “But what if they could be wrong? Shouldn’t we pray they have the courage to be honest with the information that is out there now and be true to their convictions so that we will know for sure what is true?”
They responded by saying our leaders are not wrong, and we must believe everything they hand to us. They will tell us what we are to believe, and what we are not to believe. If changes are to be made the leaders will let us know about them, and until that time it is imperative we follow their every recommendation without questioning.
I was stunned. These were educated ladies and leaders or wives of leaders in their local church. These women would rather believe a lie, if there were one, I thought to myself, then to study for themselves to find truth. They told me they were discontinuing the Bible study because they were afraid of the things I might say. They mentioned they had heard of our questioning the investigative judgment and the plagiarism of Ellen White. They told me they would notify the other women the study was ending.
Elder Cook again invited us to visit with him. We did not know what to expect from the visit, but once more, we felt this was a rather general visit. He gave us a word of caution regarding the information that was beginning to circulate and warned us about “following Ford,” meaning Desmond Ford and his material regarding the investigative judgment.
Several of my Bible studies were now no longer meeting. This freer time was allowing me to do more study. More and more people in our church were hearing the “gossip” that we were having a hard time believing in the 1844 investigative judgment teaching. More and more people were looking at us with suspicion.
Going to church was no longer a joyous, comfortable experience. Dale was having difficulty with some of the deacons not wanting to shake hands with him. Little groups of people would be seen whispering to each other and would act like everything was fine when we saw them. The elders and their families, however, all appeared to be supportive of our position because they had also looked at the evidence Dale was sharing with them. It was my practice to pray with the welcoming team before they began welcoming people as they came to church. The ladies in the group no longer wanted me to pray with them. These were the same ladies who had asked me about jewelry.
The general conference sponsored an annual Spirit of Prophecy day. On this day Dale preached a sermon, reflecting his then current position, that was not against Ellen White, but was designed to open the eyes of the people to a clearer view of the writings of Ellen White. We had seen statements in her writings that were totally contrary to Scripture.
Dale carefully addressed this in his sermon. However, this was not received well, and a retired union conference president stood at the end of the service and confronted Dale. Dale and the majority of the audience were horrified. This was not a good situation, and this news spread like wildfire to the local conference officials.
We were asked again to report to the conference. However, this time it was to meet with the entire conference committee on October 22, 1981. This committee was comprised of about thirty conference workers, pastors, and lay members from the area churches. We were both asked to be present.
On the specified day, our church board and others from our church went to the conference with us to give a defense in our behalf. We all waited in the lobby until Dale and I were called in to the committee. Our supporters were never invited in, nor were they given a chance to speak to anyone. They were praying for us the entire time, however. Questions about being a follower of Ford, not believing in the 1844 investigative judgment, and questioning the writings of Ellen White began flying like arrows at us. All questions were directed to Dale. None of the questions were addressed to me, and I did not say anything. Dale answered the questions honestly, yet carefully. They could not pin anything on us.
One of the lay members, a lady, asked with boldness, “All I hear Dale saying is that he would be happy to continue to believe and teach the 1844 investigative judgment doctrine if someone can show him how to get from Daniel 8:14 to 1844. Here we are in a room full of pastors. Why doesn’t someone do this now?” Dead silence fell in that room as people sat with closed mouths. After what seemed like an eternity no one had responded, and the president changed the subject. We believe their silence was because they all knew that the task was impossible. We were soon dismissed.
On Friday Elder Cook called Dale to come in for another visit. I was not invited to this meeting, nor was I invited to any future meetings. Elder Cook said that the committee was placing him on suspension. Dale was to preach one more time, the next day, Sabbath, but could not tell the congregation he was preaching his last sermon. He also told Dale that we were not to visit with any of the church members. We must keep this information to ourselves.
Dale left the office agreeing to this request. How ever, on the way home he realized he could not preach what he had been told would be his last sermon, to a congregation whom he loved, one that was growing, where people were being led to Christ, and one where baptisms were a frequent happening. Yes, there were some in the church who opposed our views, but the majority of the members were very supportive. Dale called Elder Cook when he got home saying he could not preach without letting the congregation know what was taking place. Elder Cook said he would come down and take the sermon. Dale also called one of the elders and the word of what was happening quickly spread among our supporters.
When Dale told me what had happened, I was filled with disbelief. The emotion and uncertainty of the last few months were beginning to take its toll on us. Tears filled my eyes and a lump rose in my throat. I assumed the action included me as well, but I was not told so. I was close to tears a lot of the time now. I was not feeling sorry for myself, but I was sad over what we were learning and over the reaction of our leaders. We would pray and walk to the end of our road reflecting on all that was taking place. We had done this many times the past few weeks. Walking in the cool Pacific breeze in an area where there were no homes seemed to give us peace and strength as we talked to each other and cried out to God. We would then come home, fall on the floor by the family room coffee table, and continue crying out to God as our hearts and souls were warmed by the fire burning in the wood stove and the reassurance we found in our Bibles. We would read our Bibles, and pray, trying to get under standing as to what God was calling us to do.
So many Scripture verses were a comfort to us at this time. I do not remember all of them now, but we were searching our Bibles for something that might say that what we were going through was not happening. A verse that would say, “You are taking a wrong road. You must quickly repent and continue your trust in the denominational leaders.” Instead, the opposite seemed to be true. There were so many verses calling us to total commitment to Jesus. We were taking a stand that we believed was based solidly on Scripture, and we were being met with contempt and criticism from our leaders. We had believed our leaders were truth seekers. We respected our leaders. We trusted them to be honest with us, yet we were learning the sad truth. It seemed to us that maintaining the status quo and keeping one’s job were higher priorities for them than following truth. Several of them had admitted to us that they knew the doctrine of the investigative judgment was wrong, and that they did not believe Ellen White was a true prophet. However, they said we should just ignore this and treat our ministry as mere employment.
Then we would think of our family and friends. What would they say? Would they shun us? Would they come to see things as we were seeing them? We realized they would never reach the same conclusions, unless they looked at the same evidence we had discovered. We knew we must follow the instruction in Matthew 10 where Jesus is sending His disciples on a missionary journey. He gives instruction about the authority He is placing on them to heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, and cast out demons. He then adds, in verse 16 and following, “Behold I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; therefore be shrewd as serpents, and innocent as doves.” Further on Jesus makes these profound statements:
A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a slave above his master. It is enough for the disciple that he become like his teacher, and the slave like his master. If they have called the head of the house Beelzebul, how much more will they malign the members of his household! Therefore do not fear them, for there is nothing concealed that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. What I tell you in the darkness, speak in the light; and what you hear whispered in your ear, proclaim upon the housetops. Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul; but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows. Therefore everyone who confesses Me before men, I will also confess him before My Father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, I wi ll also deny him before My Father who is in heaven. Do not think that I came to bring peace on the earth; I did not come to b ring peace, but a sword. And he who does not take his cross and follow after Me is not worthy of Me. He who has found his life will lose it, and he who has lost his life for My sake wi ll find it (Matthew 1 0:24-39).
We knew we would soon have to make a decision, and it did not look as if it would be an easy one.
My Cup Overflows. Copyright © 2009 by Carolyn Ratzlaff. All Scripture quotations—except where otherwise noted—are from The New American Standard Bible, © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1975, 1979, 1994 by the Lockman Foundation, used by permission. All rights reserved. Life Assurance Ministries, Inc.
Carolyn has always been a positive person enjoying life and outdoor activities such as hiking and gardening, and she and her husband currently raise a good portion of their own food in small grow boxes. She also reads many health journals and is often surprised at the contrast between what was taught through the writings of Ellen White on forbidden items of diet and health, and the beneficial evidence of these same items which is supported by a plethora of scientific studies.
She and her husband Dale Ratzlaff have two married sons and four grandchildren.
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